American Hoggers

I watched the new program, American Hoggers on A&E the other day.

At first, I thought it was going to be about the women that my "father" (Ralph Lester - DUI Felon), dated or just picks up at some bar to fuck.

Assembly of God and weight gain

I have found that if you are a god-fearing, bible-thumping, holier than thou moron that attends Assembly of god churches 2-3 times weekly, for every child the wife has, she is allowed to put on 100 lbs. 9 times out of 10, that is what they do. I guess that eating less and exercising more is just too much work. They must think spending so many hours in the kitchen preparing so much food to shovel into their and their children's mouths constitutes enough exercise for the day. They also probably figure that they lose so much weight when they take those monster shits everyday. Sorry tubbo, but your shits don't weigh as much as you think. You know, it is rather fitting to abbreviate the name of the church to "ass of god". "God" needs to have a small "g" here. Has anyone seen the lazy, fat-asses sitting in those pews? I guess the ass of god church is also filled with a lot of chubby-chasers. Sure, when you marry them, they are either thin or maybe ...

Ralph Edward Lester, Convicted Felon

I suppose that I should write, "Any similarities to anyone living or dead is purely coincidental", just so that my "relatives" don't get their panties all in a bunch. Read on! I have been told that I am much more compassionate and have a greater sense of right and wrong than most people, especially when it comes to my family. Take my father for instance... Ralph Lester, living at 10183 Kirkwood Rd., M eadowlands, MN, retired St. Louis County Deputy Sheriff. Go to http://www.mncriminals.com and search for Ralph Lester, or Ralph Edward Lester. On there, you will see 3 convictions for DUI's. They only go back 15 years, so all of his convictions aren't on there. Like the one where he came home drunk, chased me around his house and hit me with his police flashlight. I called the cops, and they came and arrested him. Well, he had a pretty cushy job while living in Meadowlands. He would sit in his bathrobe, watch TV, and then there...

Church, huh... What is it good for? Absolutely nothing?

Talk about outdated nonsense... The bible is centuries old, outdated mumbo-jumbo. It was written just to explain what people didn't understand at the time. Like, a rainbow. Um, uh, GOD MADE IT TO SHOW THAT HE WON'T FLOOD THE WORLD AGAIN! Noah's Ark... Can't ever happen. No floating vessel is large enough to hold every animal in the world. Back then, they didn't know of other continents. They figured that the world was a 100 mile radius from where they stood. But one thing is true in the bible (remember, this is satire)... If you were born out of wedlock, yes, if you are a bastard child, you and the next 10 generations are doomed to burn in the pits of hell. All of the praying and penance in the world will not change the fact that you were born a bastard child. You should find out if your great, great, great, great grandmother popped out a kid out of wedlock. It would save a LOT of wasted time going to church and praying if it won't do any good, right? Or a...

Minnesota Hell

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